Hi, I'm Chelsea, a 24 year old woman living in Baltimore, Maryland. I am currently working on getting my Cosmetology license so that I can work as a hairstylist.

I am recieving my training via apprenticeship. This means that I am trained on-the-job, and acquire the hours and knowledge necessary to pass my licensing exam from teachers and mentors at the salon in which I apprentice.

Many people ask me questions about my apprenticeship. They want to know if I went to school first, how long it takes, and if I'm "cutting hair yet". While the answers to these questions are simple, I often feel that these answers are not effectively communicated.

When people ask me, "So, are you finished with hair school or are you still finishing up?"
I say, "No, I actually am recieving my education exclusively through my apprenticeship." They almost always respond with a speechless "Ohhhhh."
Some are curious and intrigued, and seem to recognize the sense and practicality behind such an opportunity and arrangement. Others show signs of confusion, and in extreme cases, condescension.

When they ask, "So when will you be licensed?"
I say, "Well, apprenticeships in Maryland require that you recieve your education for 2 years, and I am a little over a year into it. So I have a little ways to go, but I'll be preparing for my test in the very near future".
They almost always respond with a surprised "Wow! Two years?! That's a long time!"
This response I find very interesting, and subtley insulting, because while I am certainly not suggesting that cutting hair is rocket science, it is a skill, and for those who wish for it to be more, it is an art. It requires time and dedication like any other job. It is a professional trade that requires an entirely new set of skills than those you had been using in conventional education.

When they ask, "So, Are you cutting hair yet?"
I say, "Well, yes. I always need models. I practice on mannequins and use models whenever possible. But I am not ready to be on the floor at this time."
They usually respond in a tone that suggests they wished they hadn't asked, and say, "Oh, okay."
This dialogue in particular brings me great stress. Am I not "cutting hair" if I am not cutting hair regularly on real people? Are they wondering why it's taking me so long to BE "cutting hair"?
A monsoon of self doubt drips down my brain, and I start to feel my efforts get swept aside into a little pile of dust to be discarded at the end of the day, only for the same experience to repeat itself the following day.

Part of this is obviously my own self-confidence, and part of it is that people are not informed or aware of educational alternatives, and in some cases, are turned off by its lack of formality. But the thing about apprenticeships is that it's informality is exactly why it is, in the cases of many trades, the best way to learn, not only the skill itself, but also in developing work ethic and exploring and expanding your own ideas and desires for your successes. There aren't long lectures in a giant auditorium or classroom, there isn't a highly structured lesson plan. Nothing is presented in a book and graded in any other exam but the one you take for your certification. It is an education to be experienced. It requires full commitment, and self motivation. This is an education with unsurmountable gains.

Do not get me wrong- I believe in higher education. I realize that formal education is imperative to many of the professions that heal us, build us, and defend us. But many professions do not require this same regimen of education.

College tuitions are higher than they have ever been. Students and families both are left with debts that will likely follow them for the rest of their lives. At one time, this wasn't the case, and college as the standard for success may have been realistic. But today, that standard is unsustainable, and anyone seeking a profession that can be supplemented by an alternative method of education, should not exclude that option, for their own benefit.

Another reason I chose to enter an apprenticeship was because I could not afford an education at a cosmetology school, and I did not want to go into debt if I could help it. I had heard from a friend that Maryland participates in apprenticeship programs, and I set out to find a salon that I could learn and grow with. I simply did it the old fashioned way- I called around, emailed around, and visited around, in search of salons that were interested in taking on an apprentice. I am now at one of the top up-and-coming salons in the country, and working with some of the most talented stylists in Baltimore, two of whom were also trained through apprenticeship.
I have a job secured for me there once I am licensed, and I am so well acquainted with the current clientelle that I will likely develop a more extensive professional relationship with them at some point. In addition, the salon is so busy that it always has a full list of potential clients waiting for an appointment.

I consider myself lucky. I am in the most stable position of most of my 20 something friends who have graduated from college. Most of them are working at cafes to make ends meet while they look for a position more geared towards their degree and career goals, and some eventually decide to go to grad school, so that they have a better chance of getting that job they thought they would get with their bachelor's.

I decided to share my educational experiences and ideas with you because I know that education is crucial in sustaining a healthy, responsible, capable society. I also decided to share it because the way we approach it directly affects the trajectory in which we will be moving in the next few years to come. We need for more people to realize that there are other opprotunities and skill sets available to them, that will be useful always.

This 20 something generation needs to understand that we are at a pivitol point in our civilization. When we look at our history, we can see the definition of every decade in the quality of life it lived. This decade, along with the past few, and potentially the future few, are going to be ones in our history that our grandchildren will look at and say,  "What were they thinking?", and depending on the decisions we make, maybe even "It must have been hard to live then." or "It must have been great to live then." Either response, means we are currently steering ourselves in the wrong direction.

Not to sound like your grandpa, but the spirit of individualism, entrepreneurship, liberty, courage, freedom, and prosperity are steadily depleting in our country.We must start being cognisant, aware, and responsible for our future, our childrens future, and their childrens future. We must stop trying to make a square peg fit in a round hole and acknowledge that "things" are different for us. While we may have made signigicant strides in social reform, and are still fighting to make those strides, we must not discount the crucial, extremely important health and maintanence of our economy. I know this is not a sexy subject, and personally, for a long time, the subject of money was revolting to me. It still is not attractive, but it's creeped its way under my skin as I've naturally been coming into my own independence. I read multiple news sources, and I make an effort to understand the stock market. But most importantly, I pay attention to my surroundings and my gut. There are the two things we are conditioned not to pay attention to. Our over stimulated digital society simply does not allow for us to stop and hear ourselves loud enough or feel ourselves vividly enough to know how we are really experiencing what  is happening around us.

We do not have the luxuries that previous generations did. We are faced with difficult decisions that have the power to shape the future. We must not devalue, minimize, or deny these powers and responsibilities any longer.

I know that some people will read this and say I am hysterical. I am sure I will hear any number of refutes and criticisms. This is not an argument, and I am not saying any of this to offend anyone, spread fear, or out of some demonstration of self righteousness. Every once and a while, something big, important, and WRONG happens, and if no one is talking about it, you know it is your responsibility to do whatever you can to get conversation started. This is me attempting to play some small part in waking everyone up.

I have not disclosed what exactly the catastrophe is that I am so vaguely citing but passionately refuting, and there is no way I can in one blog entry alone. But I will be back here consistently to talk about the shit hole of a crisis we are falling into, and what we can do to prepare and improve it.

Let these words not fall on deaf ears, but if they do, don't be too proud to say so if you wake up and hear one day.

I've spent a great portion of the last few weeks following several current events. My goal with my writing is to write songs outside of my own life. I listened to a great folk singer/songwriter on WTMD recently. His writing was incredibly refreshing because it was completely selfless and relateable because it was conveyed in a way that included everyone. There wasn't a trace of self-obsession in it. It spoke to me instead of at me, and I found myself drawn in to every word. His advice on songwriting was to choose an event and write from a point of view other than your own. This leaves incredible room for creativity and perspective. It made me think about songwriting in an entirely new way.

Obviously, given the reality of the world now, and also that I am somewhat of a cynic, there is no shortage of relevant and important topics to communicate. But there are a few that are particularly nagging me. So much so that thoughts of them are intrusive to my everyday routine. Does anyone else ever feel such a powerful NEED to confront these impossibly unavoidable feelings for the sole reason that they ARE UNAVOIDABLE? This in itself radiates through my gut that my feelings are real, and are based in reality.

Not to get all dooms-day-y, but something big (and bad) IS brewing here. "Here" being the world, not just the country. Of course, given my immediate surroundings and limited worldly experiences, my country is my immediate concern. But the importance of its connection to the larger body of the planet is not underestimated.

I am consistently amazed at the denial that human beings can adopt in the face of unpleasant news or unthinkable circumstances. I am certainly no exception to this very human instinct. It is, very literally, a form of self-preservation. Only in the case of The People of The United States vs. The Irresponsible Government of The United States, it isn't self-preservation at all. It's just the opposite.

Every day I, and I'm sure most other people who have acknowledged the very real potential fate of our future as individuals and as a nation, bear witness to people outright deny the reality in which we are living. They carry on with their often routine shopping habits, their luxurious dining experiences, they plan their investments for their new house, they fork over the plastic with the hope and confidence that the money behind it is still safe, attached to their name, and worth every bit as much as it was when it was earned. Good people, even intelligent people, carry on planning the future they had always dreamed they would have, ignoring the OBVIOUS SIGNS that the capacity for that dream is well on its way to dying. That its happening before their senses, and for whatever reason, they choose to dismiss these signs. At a certain point, it becomes difficult to distinguish the reasoning behind such denial. Some people are simply misguided or unaware, and there is a certain amount of personal responsibility in that. Some people are simply too proud. And some people maybe even simply do not care to be aware. That is tragic and foolish, but also a product of the society we live in, and helped to create.

I believe everyone in this country serves a purpose. We may be the victims in some situations, but we also have accepted and entrusted our wellbeing to the perpetrators time after time. Now, its too late to save. There was a time when "we" could have sucked the poison out and set ourselves onto a prosperous, healthy track. I think that time has passed. Now its a matter of survival rather than prosperity.

Historically, those who choose to live in denial, often don't come out of it until it is too late.

Things have been strange in my little old life lately. I need a place to do a little bit of complaining and sorting through my thoughts so here I am after over a year.

Basically, I am getting a case of the bores. I don't feel very confident in my work lately. My apprenticeship is going by quickly. I have a year left. But I feel like my progress is plateauing, and just when I think I'm approaching a break through, I am confronted with the frustration and disappointment that comes with realizing I still am not *getting it*. This is made worse by the fact that it's hair, not rocket science, and I feel instantly stupid for this reason alone. I study the haircutting DVDs and diagrams, I'm using both the TIGI and Sassoon approach to figure out which one may be more suitable for my learning style and technique, I practice independently whenever I can, as much as I can, I watch my superior's work as much as I can, taking as many detailed mental notes I can muster, but I still haven't reached a moment where it's all clicked. I've actually thought that I had a couple of times, but was corrected on many things by my superiors, and my confidence and enthusiasm plummeted as I was devoured by a personal sense of confusion and stupidity.

I find it hard to articulate these feelings of frustration to anyone, and especially my superiors, since they are trying to help me understrand as much as I am trying to understand. The thing is that I think they think they must not be teaching me properly, or that if they tell me the information in a different way, I will be able to execute a decent wearable haircut on my own, but I honestly think the problem is me. The more I think about it, the more I realize I am not a visual person. This isn't to say I can't train myself to be. Actually, thats precisely what I am doing, and thats precisely why and what is taking so long for me to *get it*. I do not have a mind for shapes. I have a mind for feelings and sounds.

Sometimes I just long for something that comes naturally to me. Something that gives me some release in the first 10 minutes of doing it rather than stress. And realizing the need for this release, and feeling the stress in my current life, and realizing that I could easily but regretfully spend the next 10 to 20 years doing this is what scares the shit out of me.

I wish I had foreseen this sort of regret. But then, if I hadn't taken this route, I suppose I would still undervalue the blessings that a harmonious lifestyle brings.

I know I am only 24, and it isn't too late to follow my dreams. I'm just a bit shaken at how quickly its all gone by. I had a chance to change direction and get in gear just a couple of years ago, and 22 seems so much younger.

I've taken steps. I just bought a guitar. I am singing again. I am writing again. And for the first time ever, I would really like to play a show. And I would like to do it by the summer. Like anything else, I'll just start by taking it a step at a time. But no bullshit this time. This is my last chance. And this time, I'm giving the chance to myself instead of someone else giving it to me. I suppose if there aren't any other breakthroughs going on in my life, this one can definitely take the cake. If only I had been in this place sooner.