Tanzania, by Stophavingaboringlife

Barcelona, by Astrid

The desire to travel is becoming overwhelming. While at work today, suffering from a headache that seemed to be radiating through my entire body, I was pretending myself useful, and doing laundry at pace slower than a glacier, and imagining myself in any and every place I've ever wanted to go. I started thinking, as my mind was living in this other world for a few moments, and my body in the present reality- how long am I going to be doing this?
This wishing my life away? Now, I know what you're thinking- You're thinking, at least if you're my mother or father, "Don't be foolish, Chelsea. You have responsibilities, obligations. Not to mention, you're poor and you need to get your life in order."
And this is true. I won't even elaborate on my impulsive, indecisive nature and it's adorable presence in my past. I'm getting a handle on it moreso now, very slowly. But I think it's more a matter of balance.
I believe myself to be a bit of a risk-taker, at heart. That sounds kind of... dumb, like an adolescent excuse for being irresponsible. And while I don't enjoy the particular set-backs many of these risks have caused me, there are a handful I truly will never regret.
If I could just get down to what is truly in my heart, and make those decisions my top priority, like any ambitious, inspired soul, then I'd really be proud of myself.

So- I've decided, while folding towels today- it isn't if I'm going to travel anymore, it's simply a matter of when.
I want to go back to hair school (...I think). The "I think" is what makes me feel that traveling first, is actually smarter.
Because part of me only wants to do hair because it's the next step, it's expected, and it's safe. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy hair. I find it exciting and fascinating; the things people can do with hair is insane- look at Lady Gaga for crying out loud.
Once I'm licensed, it will be vital for me to stay in one place and work diligently to build clientele. I would be devoting a good 4 or 5 years of my life to establishing this.
And while it does sound rewarding in one respect, I worry that my curiosity for the unknown will simply peak right in the middle of it- which, I know, is where self-control comes into play.
And who knows? What if I get married? What if life just starts to go in a direction I never planned for it to go? (I know thats what they always say about life, and damnit, you're only young once. If I deny myself this experience, I know I will obsess about it for years and years.)

So, why should I hush the little shred of child left inside me, so that I can start life first, take on more responsibility, and let this moment slip away as life just gets more complicated?
I guess I'm just worried that at 40, I'll think back on this time and say "I should have..." And if I'm still clueless now as to how I want my life to turn out, I still at least know that that is exactly how I don't want it to turn out.